Issues on being father again

It a strange feeling to become a father for the first time. That strangeness isn't there the second time, but in its place comes a certain kind of anxiety, which is a little harder to explain.

First things first. Its an exciting experience (if you and your spouse live alone) to go through, starting from the first pregnancy test for your wife, to consulting the doctor on a myriad number of issues, to the day, when your baby see's the first light of his/her life. You notice everything close-up, and every experience is new and fresh. That is one of the charms and the gaiety your first baby gets, for being the first baby.

Second time around, you know what is coming. And it comes with are certain questions, which need a clear understanding in the first place. First and foremost, why do you need a second kid ? Do you have the time and the energy the second kid will demand? None the less, are you aware of the financial implications of the second baby?


In the times we live, things have changed. Most of us do not have the big family net which used to exist earlier and so the pressure of child rearing is enormous. Add to it the cost of putting a kid through school, college and eventually professional education is a daunting affair, which is why most couples do not want a second baby. So, it isn't strange that we see a of single kid families all around. Did I add that, the ladies of our generation also do not want to go through the demands of pregnancy again. They are lot sensitive, than their mothers.

But, when you and your spouse decide to have a second baby, do you have a reason, infact a very good reason. I think, I can give you one good reason. When you have one kid, he/she gets all the attention, all the things and all the pampering you can shower. It can spoil him/her but more than anything else, when you are gone he/she would be left alone in this big bad universe. One of the easiest things you can give your kid is a sibling. It does a world of good. First, it limits pampering, secondly, he/she will have to learn the social structure , thirdly, he/she will have to devise ways to get your attention and not the least, these two kids will never feel lonely in their life again (they know the other exist, even when he/she is half a world away).

So, when the reason is clear, you get ready to go over again through a process ( the course of your wife's pregnancy) which you are familiar with, in a manner which you can be excited about and your first kid will need all your help to know and understand what is coming ( he/she is going to lose the dominant status).

Most people don't know why they want a second kid, and it isn't strange.

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Comments

Kiran said…
Your blog is nice.Keep writing & thanks for sharing. I think you should add your blog at www.blogadda.com and let more people discover your blog. It's a great place for Indian bloggers to be in and I am sure it would do wonders for your blog.

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